~Elmira M. Loftin

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If I Only Knew

April 15, 2016

I’m in a room with a man I’ve never met before, yet I know I’m about sleep with him. 

It’s insane, I know, but it’s going down and there’s nothing I can do about it.  Honestly, I wouldn’t stop if given the choice.  Even though the room is dark I can look into his hazel almond-shaped eyes and I know he’s about to satisfy me in ways I can only imagine.  The muscles on his chocolate brown arms ripple as reaches up to tie his long dreds back.  He licks his lips and covers the short distance between us.  The moment his lips touch mine, I know this what I’m supposed to be doing right now at this point in space and time.  He reaches for me and I go willingly into his arms as he lowers his head and captures my mouth.  He tastes like every flavor I love and when his tongue slips in my mouth I suck on it and savor his taste.  He starts walking, making me walk backwards, and I follow until I feel the backs of my legs bump into the bed.  Yes, please, lay me on the bed. 

 

But he doesn’t. 

 

Instead, he lifts my dress over my head and then reaches behind me to unfasten my bra.  Taking advantage of my freed breasts, he cups them and rubs his thumbs across my nipples as he leans in to kiss me again.  I’m pretty sure I’m getting drunk from this kiss when he leans back, then down, to slide my panties down my legs.  At this point I’m completely naked but he’s still fully clothed.  As I’m about to open my mouth to voice my opinion on this inequity, he raises his finger to his gorgeous full lips to shhhh me.

I am shhhh’ed.

 

He reaches out and gives me a slight push and I sit on the bed.  His eyes connect with mine and he begins to remove his tee shirt and jeans.  I am mesmerized by his gaze and don’t break it until he reaches for the waistband of his boxer briefs.  This I need to see.

 

Boy do I see it.

 

He is large enough to give me pause but I don’t have time to think about it because he kneels before me and slowly spreads my legs.  His eyes lock in on mine and in them I see a promise.  He leans in to fulfill that promise and immediately tiny shocks explode all over my body.  I fall back on the bed and spread my legs wider, making sure he has access to everything he wants to taste.  I ride the waves of ecstasy as he devours me, until they crash over and I come over and over again against his tongue.  Then he is above me and I know he plans to join me on the bed.  I move back to the center and he follows me, covering my body with his.  He leans in to kiss me and I can taste my flavor mingling with his. 

 

Damn we taste good together.

 

I raise my knees and he slides in between them, preparing to connect our bodies in the most intimate way.  I am ready and waiting.  My mystery lover brings himself to my center and I feel him begin to push inside.  We fit so perfectly that I am sure my body was made to compliment his.  As he begins to move, I move with him and soon we’re in our own rhythm, creating a beat that is solely unique to us.  Our music is beautiful and I feel the waves start to rise again.  I ride them as he rides me and then they crash over and over again until I can’t take it anymore and I scream, wishing I was screaming his name.

 

But I don’t know it.

 

I lock eyes with him and see that he is riding his own waves.  He’s about to crash over and opens his mouth to express his pleasure . . .

 

And Dr. Dre comes out.

 

I bolt upright in my bed, sunlight temporarily blinding me, and realize my alarm is going off.  I reach over and cut it off.

 

It was all a dream.  A damn dream.

 

I get myself together, get showered and dressed, grab a bagel and a coffee from the café on the corner and then head to work, all the while thinking about the dream and wishing my dream man was a reality.

 

I’m sitting at my desk at a well-respected accounting firm, preparing for my 10 o’clock meeting with a new client when my secretary rings through on our intercom system.

 

“Ms. Franklin, Mr. Malik James from James and Harrison Law Firm is here to see you.  He’s your 10 o’clock. Should I send him in?"

 

I look at the clock on the wall.  He’s a bit early but I’m ready.  “Yes, Phylicia , send him in,” I respond.

 

An email chimes though my computer and I look down to check it just as my door opens. 

“Hello Mr. James my name is Allison Fra . . . “ My voice trails off as I look in the face of my dream lover.  The shock on my face is evident, but what’s even more jarring is the look of shock on his face.

 

“It’s you . . .” he whispers.

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